Thursday, 9 February 2023

My Saudi Baby daddy was addicted to African girls. I became a victim.

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He seemed like a really good person and I did not fear him And you have never been kissed on you arm... especially by a white man, so close to me my friend told me the only option I had was to turn myself over to the police so that I would be deported and give birth in Kenya At that time, I was already 8 months pregnant and I was struggling to work the lady realized I was pregnant as my belly enlarged and when they asked, I told her that the father was my husband from Kenya who had come to Saudi and was working in Jeddah thank you so much Sarah for having us in your home. Introduce yourself before we go on with the story My name is Sarah Wanjiru, I was born and raised in Nakuru. I went to Lale Primary school up to class 8.


I was also the first born of 10 siblings. After class eight in 2007, my father asked me to retake the class again because he did not have the finances to take me to secondary school I went back to class 8 in 2008 and that year my mother passed away. It was a big loss for us and I had to go back home to be the mother to my siblings considering that the youngest was six months at that time I raised the youngest one and when he was about a year and half old, I left home because I was not going to secondary school, or any post-secondary course.


I had nothing going on for me I went to work as a house girl in Nakuru, my siblings still remember how I left them that day. I took my clothes in some paper bags and left I could not stay at home, take care of nine siblings, no education, and no hope for the future. I went to work as a house girl for a stranger and she mistreated me so much. Its as if she knew I was desperate because when I left home we had agreed she would pay me Ksh 2,000 every month But from then she changed after I month and said she would pay me Ksh 1500 every month. Maybe its because I opened up to her about my family struggles and she took advantage of that.


But even after she started paying me Ksh 1500, she never paid me in complete. Sometimes she paid me Ksh 1500 and other times, she didn't pay me and I worked there for one year I was raising her child. When they made chapati, I was allowed to eat only one and if I ate at lunch, at dinner, I would only get some stew I Life was very hard working there and in 2012, I met the father of my first born child, we did not even date, he was from church.


I had a debt in a certain shop and as I was on my way to pay that debt, he asked to take me to lunch and then since it was raining and he had a car, he asked me to go to his place and I went he seemed well-off, so we went and had fun. I stayed at his house for three days and then I went back to work I was already pregnant. The lady I worked for asked me to go back to whoever was responsible for the pregnancy and that's how I got married we did not date, I did not get to know him as a person. So I realized he used to chew Khat and then I asked him to stop, after a while I realized he was also using Kuber, and on top of that he was drinking, which was too much He was making money but instead of investing, he was using it for drugs. There was no conflict in the house unless when I asked him about those drugs or money At one point, I started a small shop, it did not have enough stock.


Then there was a guy who supplied cakes in the shops and another one who worked in a butchery and he started accusing me of having relations with them. He would insulted me, calling me a prostitute, without any proof What made you leave this husband? The marriage just deteriorated, he started beating me, and he would even use a slasher which he had no use having in a rental house in town. Every small mistake, he would take the slasher from under the bed and use it to beat me. If I didn't have sex with him he would beat me and say I was sleeping with those other boys He beat me so much until at one point he broke my teeth He broke your teeth? Yes, I don't know if it was a punch or something else. He even threatened to kill me After a while, I started working as a bartender, earning Ksh 200 daily. When I left him, I already had children. He used to spend money in the club where I worked so I talked to him there and he took back the kids While I was working there, I met this guy who had worked in Saudi and he told me and another girl there that we could get a chance to work there.


So I told him that as long as I would be paid, I had no problem working because I had a big burden, my siblings and my children. He introduced us to an agent, and in 2018, we processed all the necessary documents and I went to Saudi I did not sense anything bad when I got there, the man who had bought me in Saudi came to get me, he was clean, well-off, and all smiles Wait a minute, you said bought you, are people bought before going to Saudi? Yes, you don't just go, first they send money to your agent, and then they choose the girl they want from several pictures. So Khalid and his family chose me to go and work for them Do you know how much money they bought you? I don't know for sure, but from what I have heard, its about Ksh, 300, 0000.


What kind of work did you do there? He came to get me at the office, took my passport, which I never saw again, then he asked me if I was God fearing and then took me to his car and we went to his home where I found his wife and four children, at that time, their grandmother was not there I was asked to start working. I was treated in way I had never seen in Kenya. I was given my towel, a soap, and after showering, I was shown to my room I had already eaten at the office, so when I was asked if I was hungry, I told them I just wanted to sleep Then next morning, we woke up around a month, and they were very good during the first month we used to communicate in gestures because she did not understand English and I didn't know Arabic She was a good woman.


The first day, when I woke up, I was asked to go and make my breakfast. At first they did not need me to make their food, its as if they saw me as disgusting but I had no problem with that as long as I was not starving and I had a good place to sleep During the first month, she showed me how to work and since I am a hard worker, she had no problem with me. then their grandmother and an Indonesian came to live in the house. The Indonesian was a lazy person and she used to overwork me. She knew Arabic, so when the lady of the house came to ask about things, she would try to make the lady hate me but the lady knew I was a hard worker. But it got to a place I felt like I would die of overworking, because the house was big and it required at least two house girls How big was it? Very big, we slept on the top floor, then the Arabs slept on the first floor, and then on the ground floor, the house had four different sitting rooms and now include the wash-rooms, and the compound outside There houses are very big! Very big, I had that the guy who had bought me was a minister of education and things were good until the Indonesian came and started leaving all the work for me and making me look bad I was working excessively, since those Arabs spent most of their day sleeping, she would get stuck on her phone during the day and leave me to do all the work.


Then when the employer complained about the unfinished work, she would start blaming me since I could not speak Arabic I persevered all that because as long as I was getting paid, I had food, and adding how hard working we are as Kenyans. On top of that I had been able to resolve some of the financial problems back in my home.


I could pay for my children's school even though they were with their father, and I had also improved the quality of life for my siblings, so I stayed there for a year and half but they Indonesian worker was making things worse. When she heard the lady of the house coming, she would run to the sink and pretend to be washing a sufuria where were we? she would pretend that she had been working knowing the lady was about to arrive home, yet I had done all the work So it got to a point and I could not go on, the lady did not understand I was doing most of the work and the Indonesian earned more than me, I earned 800SR and she earned 1200SR.


So even though that's a lot of money to me back in Kenya, if you compared it to the work I was doing, we should at least have earned the same, but it was as if I was working for her That's when I met a girl there who worked day jobs there and she told me that I could get good money working like her because even if I am overworked there, I would be paid well, that's 2000SR per month, which was more than double what I was earning she told me that I would have to rent a house, but out there, they used to rent houses with other Kenyans and Ugandans and share the rent I started working as a house girl, but living out there for about a year. I was not dating or anything else apart from work for almost a year Then I found an app, called evermuch. I signed up as woman and I started getting recommendations of men from different countries who lived in the area That's where I met the man who impregnated me. At night after work, we started chatting and at first he had lied to me that he was from Kuwait and he was there for work.


I don't know if I got so attracted to him, but he video called me and we kept talking and he said he would come to meet me At first I was afraid because of the strict laws in Saudi, but since I lived out there, I was less afraid. In the place we lived, there was a girl from Philippines was dating an Indian girl and I asked her if that guy could come to those houses. he had told me he was an Arab from Kuwait, she told me she did not know.


So I sent my location to the guy and he came to the gate and I went out to meet him and he was a good guy I thought he would not like me, but when we met, he kissed my hand, which was surprising you saw unending love? Yeah, we had been chatting and now that we had met, I felt he was a good person and I had nothing to fear from him And you have never been kissed on you arm... especially by a white man, so close to me you can see where I had come from, so I judged him as a good man.


He left and promised to bring me some gifts the next time and true to his word, he brought me some packed jewellery. Things I had never experienced You fell for him, you were already gone He told me he was divorced, but later I came to know he was lying. I asked for leave from my boss and he took me to his apartment, which was a bachelors house from appearance. We stayed there, then we went to travel in the desert for two days. He had taken my mind I felt that I had reached my ultimate life. I had left an abusive marriage, all the men I had met in Kenya did not help me and none had done such a gesture and here this guy is kissing your hand...


Yeah, so it went on and one day, I told him my boss had gone for surgery in the US because she had cancer. I had started to trust him so I told him to come and get my salary and sent it to Kenya. he came, took my salary, and sent the money to Kenya. That was so surprising that I had met someone so trust worthy So you used to have meet ups? Yeah. And when you met? We had met about two times at work, and when I was on leave, he came for me and we went to his apartment. We used protection and I went back to work When I went back to work, we kept chatting. He was so nice you wouldn't suspect he could turnout to be untrustworthy. He did not tell me was married, but he mentioned that he had some aunties there who had also come from Kuwait for work. we did not plan about marriage or anything like that. I just trusted him because he was showing me so much love. In December, I slept with him without using protection and after that he started changing.


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The attention he used to give me reduced and when I asked him, he said he did not want a relationship and he loved his free life. I did not understand what was wrong with him, and at that time, I was already in love with him. He had told me he was divorced, and he was hard-working. So based on the kind of love he was showing me, I took him as a person that we could make a life together even though he had not told me about marriage In January, I started feeling sick and when I went to the hospital I was told that I was 3 months and 1 week pregnant it was a bad thing to me, in Saudi, I was like a mad person.


I started regretting everything that had led me there because I felt like I was ending my dreams. It is in Saudi that I felt like I was having a control over my life and I did not depend on any man who abused me because he was helping me and I hated my self for being in that situation I asked the doctor, who was Indian if there was a way I could terminate the pregnancy. They told me it was impossible. I called my friends, some were good and others hated me when I told them the news and accused me of prostitution I guess only God knows I got so stressed and I was in a foreign country and you know how Saudi is. Then I was not in contact with the man responsible and he had even blocked me. I tried to look for him. Then I talked to that Philippine girl, Lorina, I told her I was pregnant and I didn't know what to do Lorina was also shocked that it had gotten to that because I did not tell her when I was going out with that guy.


You know those Philippines also try to wait till marriage and I didn't want her to view me differently she was shocked and I told her we would not tell my boss. Then I talked to another girl from Kenya and she told me not to get an abortion despite the circumstances The doctor told me it would have been easy if I was a week pregnant but now if they were caught they would be jailed or even killed. He asked me if I was married and I told him I was not and explained to him what had happened. He sympathized with me but there was nothing he could do so he advised me to keep going for check ups during the pregnancy The hospital was called Safamaka, I kept going for check ups and when I was about six months, I found that guy on that same app I don't know if he was obsessed with black women.


I sent him a message telling him about the pregnancy, and he insulted me and said he was not responsible for the pregnancy I got even more confused and he even blocked me again I looked for him again using another phone, many girls in the Gulf know me because I was giving them the guys number hoping they could talk to him, but every time, he blocked me. I was not a prostitute and I did not understand if I was not supposed to love When I was seven months pregnant, he showed up and gave me 1000SR.


He did not want us to meet and when I found him, I told him I could not work in my condition and I even needed to go to the clinic for check up, that's when he gave me 500 SR the first time and 500 SR the second time After a sometime, I told him I wanted to come back to Kenya. He gave me 1000SR again. But I was suffering because I was not working, the gut did not want to support me, he had blocked me, so its as if I was going mad at that time, I still didn't know he was from Saudi and not Kuwait Women give birth there, but I did not have any option but to turn my self over to the police my friend had told me that the only option I had was to turn my self to the police so I would be deported and give birth in Kenya I was about 8 months pregnant and I was still struggling to work.


The lady I worked for knew I was pregnant as my belly enlarged and when they asked, I told her that the father was my husband from Kenya who had come to Saudi and was working in Jeddah I lied, but I was so stressed. My legs were swollen. So at 8 months, I told him I wanted to come back to Kenya and he gave me 1000SR, but he never wanted even to see me Did he send someone or he sent the money? he used to come to the place where I was being hosted and then he would give me the money at the gate without So from there, I had no other option, I asked around and I was told to go to a petrol station, and wait for police officers there. That's what I did, but before that, I packed my clothes and sent my clothes as cargo using half the money, but up to date, I have never received those clothes Two weeks after sending the clothes as cargo, I gave my self up to the police and I was taken to Tahir.


My friends in Kenya and Gulf knew I was there and they were afraid that I would give birth to an Arab child in the hands of the police before going to the police, I called that man and I heard some children speaking, and that's when I realized that he had a wife and 3 kids in Saudi making noise like our kid here so I realized he had a wife and I went to the police. I was held ta Tahir for one month. When I left, my boss did not file any report with the police so when they took my finger prints, I was held for a month awaiting my documents to be processed After that I came to Kenya, and I was in so much discomfort in the flight people there thought I would give birth any minute its a beautiful baby I arrived on the election date and went to hospital. I was told that I would give birth around 21st the next month so I decided to go home in Nakuru and that's where I gave birth to this baby so what has been hurting me is how the guy lied to me because otherwise, I would have had a choice.


Now he made me look as if I had gone to Saudi to be a prostitute yet I was working When I went there, I was able to take even some of my siblings to secondary school now my life there was cut short by a person who came and showed me a little love now you have seen them all here, they are all in school and I am the one who takes care of them. They need food and how do I tell them that I have no money When I imagine the life I have had to go through without education, I don't want to think this children will also have to suffer like me, yet they are smart and capable They are people I had given hope, they had seen that I was trying to educate them One thing about my family, no one runs away to get married.


They all end up as housemaids because even though our father provides food, I don't know if he is not capable, but when the children grow up to the point where he needs to support them through an education or a technical course, he fails and they are forced to leave home in search of work how many children are living with him? My sister took my children to live with him, so there are my children, then my three siblings in secondary school, the one taking a course, and the one who was left by mum at six months who is in class 5. They were all looking up to me and I feel that one day I will have to tell them that I cannot afford food, or pay for their schooling that is so pressing to me, especially knowing what I have been through at the hands of other people at no fault of mine. I wanted to be a doctor, but... its hard. Now its January and I don't even have the money for their school fees. The savings I had, I used while pregnant in Saudi and the little that was left, I have been using to support them without leaving any of them out.


Its what we eat, and take care of the baby now I am wondering how they will go back to school and I don't want to have them leave this place when you were watching the world cup, were you telling her that is where she is from? maybe she will get to know that when she grows up, for know I just feel bad for her, maybe because of the many problems we have to deal with when you look at her, you even wonder how you will raise her up here you will raise her well, she will be very beautiful, and she will adapt she has to, because she doesn't have a choice she has to because she has no choice. She is good when you give her attention like this, but when you don't, she starts to cry.


Sometimes I am very happy and sad. I was not going there for a child because the ones I could not take care even of those that I had but a child is a blessing. Yes, it is a blessing, but I wouldn't want another one the life I have had... I don't know if its just me because when I get money, I have so many people to take care of and I cannot abandon them. Personally, I have three children... Sometimes I even feel like I have no father, but I cant blame him also, he was left with many children and his wife died, so he is also stressed if he educates you up to class 8 and provides you with the food, you appreciate. But now he could not get us to high school, or a course, like the one I was paying for my brother. However, he has not started earning from it and now he is also dependent on me for food and shelter so that he can complete that course.


I am also responsible for those other girls in high school. I cannot start to ask them to go work as house girls there is one who had worked for two years as a house girl, I don't know if she was mistreated there, but she just told me she wanted to get education, and now she is doing well in school when we were starting you told us you had started a small business? Yes, when I was married. When I left my husband, the business also fell apart now that you have tried businesses, what kind of business do you think you can be successful to help you raise Abby here, and the other children. An Mpesa business, selling water and sodas, and such businesses. I believe I am good at business Place her like this if I had a business selling things like soda and water and Mpesa, then I can run such a business very well Your story is interesting and sad at the same time I never thought I would be asking for help like this, I am hard working, but even my legs are not well, maybe because of the strain I really don't know what to say. Do not worry, this child can be a blessing to you, you can see how cute she is nooo...


Don't chew that I would like you to give your phone number where people can reach you? My phone number is 07 27 98 38 39 Your full name? My name is Sarah Wanjiru Thiong'o There are so many girls right now getting processed to go to Saudi, do you have a message for them? what would you tell them? I would tell them that Saudi is a good place if you go to work. But if you meet someone and they claim to love you, know that men are the same regardless of country or race, so count what it might coast you Don't just see how the guy is making you happy, maybe he is doing that for now and once he is done with you, he will disappear Maybe he even has a family and the little money he has left he uses on you just for that moment remember what has pushed you to go to work there I have nothing against my child because she is here, but if you get pregnant there, you will find life really hard there so my advice is to go there and focus on work and help your family. Otherwise your plans will get stuck like mine, and you will be raising a child whose fathers doesn't care about and you as the woman will bear that burden What do you do this days? As you can see, I have a small baby, so the savings I had from Saudi have been sustaining us.


I had a good plan when I was in Saudi and if I didn't get pregnant or if I had help taking care of this baby, my life would still be on track, it would be stable. but right now, kids are going back to school... Tell me how many people live with your here, your three children, and My two sisters and my brother. Those are six people living with you. they also depend on you? Yes, and even those who are back home with father, I am the one who took them to secondary school you want to help them? Yes, that is my happiness, at least to see them complete secondary school education because it is important. I cannot get a job even at the supermarket because I don't have a form four certificate.


but if they complete secondary school, they can get a job in those supermarkets or other places, and they can also further their education. Today, education speaks for you in Kenya, the only thing I can do is be a house girl, or get into business but these children are young and have their dreams and they depend on me. She knows you are her mother and all other things that happened are irrelevant to her right now, she will know later.

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